snail's pace is fast enough for me

busy busy busy busy.
sometimes life just decides to provide you with compulsory moments of rest and laughter. or else, we'd all go insane. this weekend was a compulsory rest weekend, according to my mother and according to the way life worked out. i only had time for homework today, and i stressed slightly all weekend about when i'd get my work done.

year twelve plays with your head that way.. even when you're sleeping you're working out what work you need to be doing when you wake up. my brain never sleeps, it's so tiring.

but, this weekend was filled with shopping, lunches, dinners, church, soccer and family (friends). it was a great weekend, and a welcomed rest (although, mum had to force the welcomed part a bit).

thanks to my mother and jerusha for topping it all off as a fantastic weekend.
i always love the time i spend with the twins :)

now.. back to reality.
goodbye lovely weekend, hello year twelve.

to do or not to do

decisions to make.
1. uni
2. uni course
3. whether or not to do grade 8 piano this year
4. to honour God

i hate making decisions.
can someone please make them for me?

waiting on the world to change

I heard them talking of their tomorrow -
beautiful people -
talking of life and love,
of war and death
and changing the world -
circles of conversation
like goldfish in a bowl
going nowhere -
I thought of yesterday
and didn't have the heart to tell them
we were the beautiful people then -
trying to change the world
and our circles of conversation
were like goldfish in a bowl
going nowhere . . . . .

from the Thoughts of Nanushka Volume I
by Nan Witcomb

better days

i've seen better days than these.

this week has dragged on so much it feels like three.
thank goodness it's over.
finally.
and now, let the tsunami of homework hit me.

just a quick little funfact:
God once spoke to me through a secular song - Jason Mraz's Details in the Fabric..
the verse that said:

"Hang on
Help is on the way
Stay strong
I'm doing everything"

spoke to me once when i was really struggling. i remembered that time today. maybe this'll speak to more of you. God is telling you to HANG ON! and he's there, even if sometimes it doesn't feel like it. Just be strong. He's there - behind the scenes.

Apart from that, there's more family drama from malaysia. that will make four trips in one year.

smile though your heart is breaking

ahh.. those carefree days where the sun shone brighter, the smiles on our faces were bigger and anything was possible. i wish i could retreat back to then.

Quirk

It's awesome how everyone has their little quirks. Everyone is unique and has something different to give to the world. I know this sounds to cliche, but seriously, everyone of my friends brings something different to my life.

I was reminded what i loved about my Best friend last night. One thing I had forgotten was her love to quote movies, just like me. I forgot where I got my love of quoting from. It's one of those things that started all those years ago after watching "Uptown Girls" and "Napoleon Dynamite" and our favourite person to quote? Winnie the Pooh.

I love that one of my best friends (who is a guy) is so arty and fashionable and loves shopping more than me. I love that he buys me the best presents ever cos he knows the kind of fashion sense/style I have. I love that sometimes we think he could be gay because of the way he dresses and the things he talks about (but of course he's not).

I love that one of my best friends acts like my big brother. I love how he is this really dignified, righteous, upstanding, cool kinda guy when you first meet him.. until you realise that he actually makes really lame jokes. I love the way he's kinda protective too.

I love that one of my best friends who is older than me is sometimes like my little sister. I love that we can talk about anything, and I love her love of all things vintage and retro. I love how we can completely relate on all things to do with our families because theyre kind of the same. I love the way she cleans her room a billion times over jus so she doesn't have to start her homework!

I love that one of my closest friends grew up in Chille. I love his weird accent.

It's all these things about all these people that I love. Of course, there are many more, but I can't list them all. seriously, my life would be a bore without you guys.

In short, quirkiness doesn't always equal arty-dressed, nerd glasses wearing people. Quirkiness is present in all of us, and I guess it's these little things that we find we miss about each other.

we were so busy with our games, we forgot about the white rabbit

Don't make me fall in love again,
don't let your hand touch mine,
don't make that old familiar thrill
start tingling in my spine -
Don't make the nights rush by again
and all the days seem long -
don't fill my earth and sky again -
let one of us be strong.
Don't make me talk about you,
just to say your name aloud
or let my eyes betray me
when I see you in a crowd -
Don't make me fall in love again,
please let my heart decide
that this is just another game,
a roller coaster ride -
but who knows where a love begins
or how a game might end -
and maybe somewhere in between
I'll fall in love again . . . .

by Nan Witcomb,
from "The Thoughts of Nanushka"
Volume I, "Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow"

when she loved me

what do you say to someone who has stopped being in your life for a whole year after being there for you for four?

wisdom please God?
wisdom would be nice.

i would really really like to not screw this up. thanks.